Incredibad

I just had sex

Turtleneck & Chain

The Lonely Island is a comedy rap group consisting of filmmakers Akiva Schaffer, Jorma Taccone, and Andy Samberg (aka The Dudes). The group was originally formed in Berkeley, California - in 2001 - but they now reside in New York City. They write, produce, and are featured in the &quot;SNL Digital Shorts&quot; on Saturday Night Live (Samberg is a current cast member, Taccone and Schaffer are writers) most notably &quot;Lazy Sunday,&quot; &quot;Dick In A Box&quot; featuring Justin Timberlake, &quot;Jizz In My Pants, &quot;I Just Had Sex&quot; featuring Akon, and &quot;I'm On A Boat&quot; featuring T-Pain.

Fm
When you?re out at a club and you see a fly girl
do the creep (haaaa)
do the creep (haaaa)

Bbm
And if you wanna make friends at the ATM

C#
Do the creep (haaaa)

Cm
And do the creep (haaaa)

Fm
Well we got a new dance, so get up on your feet
It?s real easy to do and it?s called the creep

Bbm
Let your hands flop round like a marionette

C#                         Cm
Pop your knees up and down sh-sh-shakin? your neck

Fm
Now pull your waistband up like you expecting a flood
And stick your hair down flat like it was covered in mud

Bbm,
Trim up your pencil mustache and pop them peepers

C#                         Cm
Put this in your speakers, you a certified creeper

Fm
When you see a country bitch laying out at the beach
Do the creep (haaaa)
And do the creep (haaaa)

Bbm
And when a fine PYT walks in front of your tree

C#
do the creep (haaaa)

Cm
And do the creep (haaaa)

Fm
I was six years old when I started creeping
My parents took it to their room and I started peeping

Bbm
Can you imagine their surprise when they lifted their heads

C#                             Cm
And saw my little ass creeping at the foot of the bed

Fm
And they knew I was a creep since the day I was born
Get popping out of momma like some kettle corn

Bbm
And the doctor saw my head and he starting freaking

C#                       Cm
Cause I came clean and I came out creeping

Fm
When I was a girl, I creeped in the boys locker room
Hide deep inside, it was my little creep stalker room

Bbm
As they dis-robed I was oogling and oggling

C#                   Cm
Little did they know that for me they was modelling

Fm
And I would laugh ha ha ha ha ha haha
And they would dance la la la la lalala-laaa

Bbm
So pop pop pop your peepers and turn out your sneakers

C#                    Cm
Don?t sleep, come and get ya creep on with me

Fm
Go get ya sweating off ya bride at her wedding
do the creep (haaaa)
And do the creep (haaaa)

Bbm
But when you sneek into a wake and you see a beefcake

C#
Do the creep (haaaa)

Cm
And do the creep (haaa)

Fm
When the judge is a hottie and you can?t control ya body
Do the creep (haaaa)
And do the creep (haaa)

Bbm
So get ya knees flexin? and your arms T-rexin?

C#
Do the creep (haaaa)

Cm
And do the creep (haaa)

The Creep

Intro
Am
Aww ____, get your towels ready it's about to go down (shorty, yeah)
C
Everybody in the place hit the _____ deck (shorty, yeah)
F
But stay on your ______ toes
G
We running this, let's go


Chorus
Am
I'm on a boat (I'm on a boat); I'm on a boat (I'm on a boat)
C
Everybody look at me 'cause I'm sailing on a boat (sailing on a boat)
F
I'm on a boat (I'm on a boat); I'm on a boat
G
Take a good hard look at the _______ boat (boat, yeah)


Verse 1 (Akiva)
Am
I'm on a boat _________ take a look at me
C
Straight flowing on a boat on the deep blue sea
F
Busting five knots, wind whipping out my coat
G
You can't stop me _________ cause I'm on a boat


Verse 2 (Andy)
Am
Take a picture, trick (trick); I'm on a boat, _____ (_____)
C
We drinking Santana champ, cause it's so crisp (crisp)
F
I got my swim trunks and my flippie-floppies
G
I'm flipping burgers, you at Kinko's straight flipping copies


Verse 3 (Akiva)
Am
I'm riding on a dolphin, doing flips and ____
C
The dolphin's splashing, getting everybody all wet
F
But this ain't Seaworld, this is real as it gets
G
I'm on a boat, _______, don't you ever forget


Verse 4 (Andy)
Am
I'm on a boat and it's going fast and
C
I got a nautical themed pashmina afghan
F
I'm the king of the world, on a boat like Leo
G
If you're on the shore, then you're sure not me-oh


Spoken (Andy)
Get the _____ up, this boat is REAL!!!


Verse 5 (Akiva)
Am
____ land, I'm on a boat, ______ (______)
C
____ trees, I climb buoys, ______ (______)
F
I'm on the deck with my boys, ________ (yeah)
G
This boat engine make noise, ________


Verse 6 (Andy)
Am
Hey ma, if you could see me now (see me now)
C
Arms spread wide on the starboard bow (starboard bow)
F
Gonna fly this boat to the moon somehow (moon somehow)
G
Like Kevin Garnett, anything is possible


Verse 7/Bridge (T-Pain)
Am
Yeah, never thought I'd be on a boat
C
It's a big blue watery road (yeah)
F
Poseidon
G
Look at me, oh (all hands on deck)
Am
Never thought I'd see the day
C
When a big boat coming my way
F
Believe me when I say
G
I ______ a mermaid


Chorus/Ending
Am
I'm on a boat; I'm on a boat
C
Everybody look at me 'cause I'm sailing on a boat (woaah)
F
I'm on a boat; I'm on a boat
G
Take a good hard look at the _______' boat (sha-sha-shorty, shorty, yeah)

I'm On A Boat

Am
Aww ____, get your towels ready it's about to go down 
C
Everybody in the place hit the _____ deck 
F
But stay on your ______ toes
G
We running this, let's go



Am
I'm on a boat (I'm on a boat); I'm on a boat (I'm on a boat)
C
Everybody look at me 'cause I'm sailing on a boat 
F
I'm on a boat (I'm on a boat); I'm on a boat
G
Take a good hard look at the _______ boat 



Am
I'm on a boat _________ take a look at me
C
Straight flowing on a boat on the deep blue sea
F
Busting five knots, wind whipping out my coat
G
You can't stop me _________ cause I'm on a boat


Am
Take a picture, trick; I'm on a boat _____ 
C
We drinking Santana champ, cause it's so crisp 
F
I got my swim trunks and my flippie-floppies
G
I'm flipping burgers, you at Kinko's straight flipping copies



Am
I'm riding on a dolphin, doing flips and ____
C
The dolphin's splashing, getting everybody all wet
F
But this ain't Seaworld, this is real as it gets
G
I'm on a boat, _______, don't you ever forget



Am
I'm on a boat and it's going fast and
C
I got a nautical themed pashmina afghan
F
I'm the king of the world, on a boat like Leo
G
If you're on the shore, then you're sure not me-oh





Am
____ land, I'm on a boat, ______ 
C
____ trees, I climb buoys, ______ 
F
I'm on the deck with my boys, ________ 
G
This boat engine make noise, ________



Am
Hey ma, if you could see me now 
C
Arms spread wide on the starboard bow 
F
Gonna fly this boat to the moon somehow 
G
Like Kevin Garnett, anything is possible



Am
Yeah, never thought I'd be on a boat
C
It's a big blue watery road 
F
Poseidon
G
Look at me, 
Am
Never thought I'd see the day
C
When a big boat coming my way
F
Believe me when I say
G
I ______ a mermaid



Am
I'm on a boat; I'm on a boat
C
Everybody look at me 'cause I'm sailing on a boat 
F
I'm on a boat; I'm on a boat
G
Take a good hard look at the _______' boat

Im On A Boat

repeat throughout the whole song

           Bm          G
I just had se-eexx
           D           A
And it fe-elt so good
           Bm          G
I wanna let you let me put my penis
           D           A
Insi-ide herr

I just had se-ex!


cheers!

I Just Had Sex

# Strum= Down up Chunk
# 
# Bm  G         D       A                                          Bm
#     Sometimes (ohhhhh) Something xxxxxxxxx xxxxxxx xx xxxx xxxxx (Akon) 
#                   G                            D
#     xxx xxxx xxxx how xx xxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xx (And Lonely Island)
#    A
#     You xxxx xxxxx sing 
# 
#     Chorus:
#               Bm  G       D       A
#     I xxxx had xxx and xx felt xx good 
#  Bm                 G             D       A 
#     A xxxxx xxx xx put my xxxxx inside her 
#               Bm  G          D       A
#     I xxxx had xxx and xxx never xx back 
#  Bm                  G                D   A
#     To xxx xxx xxxxxx sex xxxx xx xxx past 
# 
#              Bm                G
#     Have xxx ever xxx xxx? I have, xx xxxx xxxxx 
#         D                   A
#     It felt xx xxxx xxxx x did xx xxxx xx xxxxx
#       Bm                  G
#     A girl xxx xx xx xx It literally xxxx xxxxxxxx
#      D                            A
#     Having xxx xxxxx xxxx x xxxx man xxx xxx xxxxxxx 
# 
#            Bm                      G
#     Never guess xxxxx x xxxx xxxx from, x xxx xxx
#           D                         A
#     If x had xx xxxxxxxx xxx feeling, it xxx xxx xxxx
#            Bm                    G
#     When x had xxx xxx, xxx xx p***s xxxx xxxxx
#             D                           A
#     And x called xx xxxxxxx xxxxx xxxxx I xxx xxxx
# 
#  
#         Bm                       G
#     Oh hey, xxxxx xxx xxx there, Guess xxxx x xxxx xxx 
#          D                     A
#     Had sex, xxxxxxxxx, xxx her boobies xxx xxx xxxx 
#           Bm                          G
#     Well sure, xxxx xx xxx xx xxx you do xxxx xxxxx
#              D                  A
#     Nice of any xxxx xxxx. Now sing 
# 
#     Chorus:
#               Bm G         D       A
#     I xxxx had xxx and xx felt xx good 
# Bm                  G             D       A
#     A xxxxx xxx xx put xx xxxxx inside her 
#  
#     Wanna xxxx xxx world 
# 
# 
# Bm                G                                   D
#     To xx xxxxxx, I'm xxxxxxxxx xxx xxxx wanted xx xx do it 
#                           A
#     Doesn't xxxxx xxxx sense xxx xxx, screw it
#     Bm                                 G
#     I ain't xxx xx xxxxx with x xxxx thing. xxx xxxxx xx xx wife 
#     D                        A
#     That good? xxX xxxx 30 seconds xx xx life 
#             Bm                      G
#     I'm xx humbled xx x xxxxx ability xx xxx xx xx xxx 
#               D                      A
#     Cuz honestly xx xxxx xxx with x pile xx manure 
#             Bm                        G
#     With that in xxxx xxx xxxx, xxxx smelling xxxxx better 
#         D                           A      
#     She let xx wear xx xxxxx xxx my turtle xxxx xxxxxxx 
# 
# 
#        Bm                   G
#     So this xxxx xxxxxxxxx to them xxxxx
#          D                     A
#     That let xx xxxx xxxxxx on top xx xxxx
#               Bm                  G
#     If xxx'xx near x xxx, whether short xx xxxx
#       D                        A
#     We wanna xxxxx xxx xxx for letting xx xxxx xxx
# 
# 
#              Bm
#     She xxxx looking xx xxx watch 
#            G
#     Doesn't matter, xxxx xxx 
#           D
#     But x cried xxx xxxxx time 
#            A
#     Doesn't matter, xxxx xxx 
#        Bm
#     I think xxx xxxxx xxxx xxxx a racist 
#            G
#     Doesn't matter, xxxx xxx 
#               D
#     She xxx x bag xx xx head 
#             A
#     Still counts!
# 
#               Bm  G       D           A
#     I xxxx had sex and xx dreams xxxx true 
#       Bm                     G                           D
#     So if you xxx xxx xx xxx last 30 xxxxxxx then xxx'xx qualified xx xxxx
#         A
#     with me 
# 
#     Final Chorus:
#               Cm Ab       Eb      Bb
#     I xxxx had sex and xx felt xx good 
# Cm                 Ab             Eb      Bb
#     A xxxxx xxx me put my xxxxx inside her 
#               Cm Ab         Eb       Bb 
#     I xxxx had sex and xxx never xx back 
# Cm                    Ab              Eb  Bb
#     To the xxx xxxxxx sex xxxx xx the past
# 
# Cm   Ab   Eb       Bb
#           La la la la

I Just Had Sex (feat. Akon)

E
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
     B
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
C#m 
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
     A
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah 
E
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah 
     B
Yeah yeah yeah no no 
C#m
Yeah yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah 
     A
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
 

verse 1

E
Summertime in the city
    B
And everybody's having sex 
      C#m                                     A
You know I just got a page from a girl that I met last week at the Payless
 
Shoe stores
E                               B 
I also have a cutie to call who likes the way I knock on her boots 
                          C#m
Well let's help them back
 
Let's handle that
 
In two-to-six hours,
      A
We'll meet back here and regroup
 
Now let's shoop 
E
Roll up to her crib with some Bartles & James 
            B
Hop off the buss with the Alizé
    C#m
Now hold up player, whatchu diggity-doing here? 
         A
I should diggity-ask you the same 

And she sang 
E
Hey, boys I want you both 
  B
I hope that you think that's cool 

(Say word?) 
  C#m
I know most guys won't freak together 
       A
She forgot about the Golden Rule ? a huh huh 


Chorus
      E
It's OK to put us in a three-way
         B
It's not gay when it's in a three-way 
       C#m  
With a honey in the middle there's some leeway
    A 
The area's grey in a one, two, three-way


verse 2 ( same chords as verse 1)

Normally, I don't get down with dudes 
But tonight is a special exception (Great) 
See you're my best friend 
Through thick and thin 
Now it's time to make a triple connection 
Lights off 
Here in the dark (Here in the dark) 
It's so hard to tell (So hard to tell) 
Where her body ends (La la) 
And my homie's begins (Ew wee) 
This rule dates back (The Golden Rule) 
To ancient Greece (Takin' about Cesar) 
We're two Jack Trippers and a Chrissy 
The new Three's Company 

chorus

It's OK to put us in a three-way 
It's not gay when it's in a three-way 
With a honey in the middle there's some leeway 
The area's grey in a one, two three-way

verse 3 ( same chords as verse 1 and verse 2)
 
Fellas. Get ready. 
To Impress a chick 
Helicopter d*ck, go! Hellicopter d*ck. Helicopter d*ck 
To Impress a chick chick 
Helicopter d*ck

chorus
 
And all of that was OK 
'Cuz it was in a three-way 
It's right there when you see the instant replay (boom) 
Maybe two is enough 
That's what they'll say 
But we'll say, "Hell no." 
It's a one, two, three-way 
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

3-way ( It's Not Gay )

[Intro]

Dm7 Fmaj7 Bb A
E|-----------------------8-------------------------------------------------------------|
B|-------6------------10--------------6------------------------------------------------|
G|-------5------------9---------------7--------6--7--7/9-------------------------------|
D|-----7-----------10-------------8---------------------7------------------------------|
A|---5----------8----------------------------------------------------------------------|
E|-----------------------------6------------5------------------------------------------|

Finest Girl Bin Laden Song intro

# Sometimes, something beautiful happens in this world (Akon) 
# You don't know how to express yourself so (and Lonely Island)
# You just gotta sing 
------------------------------------------------
           Bm G       D       A                    
I just had sex and it felt so good (felt so good) 
Bm             G            D         A                 
A woman let me put my penis inside her
           Bm G         D        A                   
I just had sex and I'll never go back
       Bm            G            D   A                   
To the not-having-sex ways of the past 
------------------------------------------------
         Bm              G                        
Have you ever had sex? I have, it felt great 
   D                   A                        
It felt so good when I did it with my penis 
  Bm                    G                          
A girl let me do it, it literally just happened
D                            A                    
Having sex could make a nice man out the meanest 
------------------------------------------------
       Bm                            G               
You'll never guess where I just came from, I had sex 
     D                            A                  
If I had to describe the feeling, it was the best 
       Bm                  G                        
When I had the sex, man my penis felt great
      D                             A                  
And I called my parents right after I was done 
------------------------------------------------
   Bm                         G         
Oh hey, didn't see you there, guess what I just did 
    D                       A                          
Had sex, undressed, saw her boobies and the rest 
    Bm                          G          
Was sure nice of her to let you do that thing 
        D                  A            
Nice of any girl ever, now sing!
------------------------------------------------
           Bm G       D       A                    
I just had sex and it felt so good (felt so good) 
Bm             G            D         A                 
A woman let me put my penis inside her
# I wanna tell the world 
------------------------------------------------
Bm              G                                D                 
To be honest I'm surprised she even wanted me to do it 
                    A     
Doesn't really make sense but man, screw it 
Bm                               G                   
I ain't one to argue with a good thing. She could be my wife 
D                  A       
That good? Best 30 seconds of my life 
------------------------------------------------
       Bm                        G          
I'm so humbled by a girls ability to let me do her 
    D                            A         
Cuz honestly I'd have sex with a pile of manure
     Bm                                  G          
With that in mind the soft, nice-smelling girl's better 
        D                           A         
And she let me wear my chain and my turtle neck sweater 
------------------------------------------------
        Bm              G                  
So this one's dedicated to them girls  
     D                     A              
That let us flop around on top of them
          Bm                   G            
If you're near or far, whether short or tall 
   D                       A                   
We wanna thank you all for letting us fuck you 
------------------------------------------------
         Bm                            G                  
She kept looking at her watch. Doesn't matter, had sex 
      D                             A           
But I cried the whole time. Doesn't matter, had sex 
            Bm                                G         
I think she might have been a racist. Doesn't matter, had sex 
          D                     A         
She put a bag on my head. Still counts 
------------------------------------------------
           Bm G       D           A                  
I just had sex and my dreams came true 
   Bm                       G               
So if you?ve had sex in the last 30 minutes 
            D                      A          
Then you're qualified to sing with me 
------------------------------------------------
           Cm Ab      Eb      Bb                          
I just had sex and it felt so good (felt so good)
Cm             Ab           Eb        Bb                      
A woman let me put my penis inside her 
           Cm Ab        Eb       Bb                       
I just had sex and I'll never go back
       Cm            Ab           Eb  Bb                      
To the not-having-sex ways of the past
------------------------------------------------
Cm Ab Eb       Bb                      
LA LA LA LA LA LA


# http://ukulily-filly.blogspot.com/2012/05/free-ukulele-tabs-with-lyrics.html

# The verses are Am, F, C, G four strums down of each, 
# then the chorus is Am (2 strums), Hammer on F (one strum),
# C (2 strums), Hammer on G (one strum)


Verse 1: 0:22-0:57

Boys, lets get to it.

Here we go.

Ungh, Lonely Island, Michael Bolton

YEAAAHH!

The night starts now

Together on the track, the boys are back

The night starts now

Night starts now baby roll with us, chicks snapping at the neck when
we rollin' up.

ROLLIN' UP

Blow through the doors ain't no holdin' up

YEAH

Black card at the bar like I gives a fuck.

COME ON

Ladies shifty eyed when we walk into the set, fuck the fellas looking
jealous play the back and get wet

YEAH YEAH

Three pound in my waist, shank in my sock, you either get cut, get stuffed
or get shot.


Chorus 1: 0:58-1:17

Am          F       C            G     
THIS IS THE TALE OF CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW

Am        F            C     G
PIRATE SO BRAVE ON THE SEVEN SEAS
(What?)

  Am       F            C          G
A MYSTICAL QUEST TO THE ISLE OF TORTUGA

Am          F           C       G
RAVEN LOCKS SWAY ON THE OCEAN'S BREEZE


Verse 2: 1:18-1:37

Yeah that was kinda weird, but we're back in the club

Buying up the bar so the groupies show us love

KIERA KNIGHTLY

Motherfucking ice-man, I'm the top gunner

Heater on blast, I'm the number one stunner

JACK SPARROW

Watch it girl cause I ain't your "Mr. Nice Guy",

More like the "meet ya take you home and fuck you twice guy"

YEAH YEAH!

All dressed up with nowhere to run,

And now I make you feel crazy with the-

NOW BACK TO THE GOOD PART:


Chorus 2: 1:38-1:57

         Am         F        C             G
FROM THE DAY HE WAS BORN, HE YEARNED FOR ADVENTURE
(Nooo)

Am          F           C         G
OLD CAPTAIN JACK GIVING THEM WHAT FOR!

         Am            F         C            G
HE'S THE PAUPER OF THE SURF, THE JESTER OF TORTUGA
(Yeah? Uh huh)                    (oh God)

       Am          F       C            G
BUT IN DAVY JONES' LOCKER, WHAT LIES IN STORE?
(Yeah, we've seen the movie)


Bridge: 1:58-2:12

Throw your hands in the air and say hell yeah, come on

CAPTAIN JACK
What?

JOHNNY DEPP
No

From the front to the back say we count stacks come on

DAVY JONES
Nope

GIANT SQUID
Wrong

Michael Bolton we're really gonna need you to focus up

ROGER THAT LET ME TRY IT WITH ANOTHER FILM
Wait--


Chorus 3: 2:13-3:10

Am               F                 C               G
LIFE IS A BOX OF CHOCOLATES AND MY NAME IS FORREST GUMP
(Not better)

           Am               F                   C                    G
THOUGH I'M NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED, I GIVE JENNY ALL OF MY LOVE
(Come on!)

 Am          F                   C                G
OKAY THEN I'M A LEGAL AIDE, ERIN BROCKOVICH IS MY NAME
(Nooo, God)

     Am              F                 C              G
THEN YOU CAN CALL ME SCARFACE, SNORTIN MOUNTAINS OF COCAINE
(close enough)

YOU COCKROACHES WANNA PLAY ROUGH? OKAY, I'M RELOADING

Am          F       C       G
THIS IS THE TALE OF TONY MONTANA

Am     F               C     G
CUBANO FLAME, WITH THE MIAMI NUTS
(Take it home!)

      Am       F             C       G
GOT A BASEHEAD WIFE, BUT HER WOMB IS POLLUTED

     Am             F           C              G
THIS WHOLE TOWN'S A PUSSY, JUST WAITING TO GET FUCKED!

Ooookay, turns out Michael Bolton is a major cinephile

YOU COMPLETE ME!

Yup, yeah, ok?

Jack Sparrow

F                          G
Lock eyes from across the room
Am
Down my drink while the rhythms boom
F                          G
Take your hands, skip the names
Am
No need here for the silly games
F                          G
Make our way through the smoke and crowd
Am
The club is the sky and I'm on your cloud
F 		    G
Move in close as the lasers fly
Am
Our bodies touch and the angels cry

F 		      G
Leave this place go back to yours
Am
Our lips first touch outside your doors
F                            G
The whole night what we've got in store
Am
Whisper in my ear that you want some more
F                             G
And I jizz in my pants

F                             G
This really never happens you can take my word
Am
I won't apologize, that's just absurd
F                              G
Mainly your fault for the way that you dance
Am
And now I jizz in my pants
F                               G
Don't tell your friends or I'll say you're a slut
Am
Plus it's your fault, you were rubbing my butt
F
I'm very sensitive , some would say thats a plus

Am
Now I'll go home and change

(carry on with this rythem)

I need a few things from the grocery
Do things alone now mostly
Left me heartbroken, not lookin' for love
Surprise in my eyes when I looked above
The checkout counter and I saw her face
My heart stood still so did time and space
Never thought that I could feel real again
But the look in her eyes said I need a friend
She turned to me that's when she said it
Looked me dead in the face, asked cash or credit
And I jizzed in my pants

It's perfectly normal
Nothing wrong with me
But we're going to need a cleanup
On aisle 3
And now I'm posed in an awkward stance
Because I jizzed in my pants
To be fair
You were flirting a lot
Plus the way you bag cans makes me
Bothered and hot
Please stop acting like you're not impressed
One more thing
I'm gonna pay by check

Last week, I saw a film
As I recall it was a horror film
Walked outside into the rain
Checked my phone and saw you rang
And I jizzed in my pants

Speeding in the street, when the red lights flash
Need to get away, need to make a dash
A song comes on that reminds me of you
And I jizz in my pants

The next day
My alarm goes off
And I jizz in my pants

Open the window and a breeze rolls in
And I jizz in my pants

When Bruce Willis was dead at the end of Sixth Sense
I jizzed in my pants

I just ate a grape
And I jizzed in my pants

I went to. . .
Ok seriously you guys, can we. . . . ok?

Capo 1st Fret
F                   G
I jizz right in my pants
Am
Every time you're next to me
F                    G
And when we're holdin hands
Am
Its like havin sex with me
F                     G
You say I'm premature
Am
I just call it ectasy
F                     G
I wear a rubber at all times
Am
Its a necessity
F                      G
Cuz I jizz in my pants
Am
(I jizz in my pants, I jizz in my pants (x3))
F                       G
Yes I jizz in my pants
Am
(I jizz in my pants, I jizz in my pants)

Ji$@ In My Pants

#this #is #my #fav.


Artist: The Lonely Island
Song: Mother Lover


Intro: Am Em F

Am 
 Oh dang, what is it dawg?
  Em         F
I forgot its Mothers Day
Am
 Didn't get a gift for her
Em              F
Other plans got in the way
Am
 She'll be so disappointed
Em         F
 Damn I forgot it too
Am 
 This could have been avoided
Em                   F
What the hell are we gonna do?

Am                       Em            F
 My moms been so forlorn ever since my daddy left, COLD
Am                        Em               F
 No one to hold her tight life has put her to the test
Am                          Em               F
 I know just what you mean, my mom's been so sad and gray, WORD
Am                               Em                    F
 My dad can't satisfy her in the bedroom ever since he passed away

Am                             Em                         F  
Hold Up, you thinkin' what I'm thinkin', I'm thinkin' I'm thinkin' too
Am                       Em                    F  
Slow up, What time is it dawg, it's time for a switcharoo
Am                      Em               F  
 We both love our moms, women with grown women needs
Am                       Em                     F  
 I say we break 'em off, show 'em how much they really mean

Chorus:
       G
'Cause I'm a mother lover, you're a mother lover
                    Am                        F
We should f*** each others mothers, f*** each others moms
     G
I'll push in that place that you came out as a baby
                    Am                          F
Ain't no doubt that sh** is crazy, f***in' each others moms
       G
'Cause every mother's day needs a mother's night
   Am                         Em             F
If doing it is wrong, I don't wanna be right
    Am                            Em      F
I'm callin' on you 'cause I can't do it myself
   Am                           Em           F
To me you're like a brother, so be my mother lover

Am                                           Em                    F
 I'll be laying on the couch waitin' for you mom clutchin' on this lube and roses
Am                        Em                         F
 I got my digital camera, I'mma make your momma do a million poses
Am                         Em          F
 They will be so surprised,  we are so cool and thoughtful
Am                            Em                         F
 Can't wait to pork your mom, Im'ma be the syrup she can be my waffle
Am                         Em               F
Show'd up, my mother loves bubble bath with chamomile
Am                             Em          F
Straight up, give it to my mom D-D-D-D-D-D-doggystyle
Am                         Em            F
 This is the perfect plan, for a perfect mother's day
Am                               Em               F
 They'll have to rename this one all up under the covers day

Chorus:
       G
'Cause I'm a mother lover, you're a mother lover
                    Am                        F
We should f*** each others mothers ,f*** each others moms
     G
I'll push in their place where you came out as a baby
                    Am                          F
Ain't no doubt that sh** is crazy, f***in' each others moms, break it down

G
It would be my honor to be your new step-father
Am                      F
It would be my honor to be your new step-father
    G
And while you're in my mother, make me another brother, Yeah
    Am                             F
And while I'm in your mother, I'll never use a rubber, Oh!

       G
'Cause every mother's day needs a mother's night
   Am                         Em             F
If doing it is wrong, I don't wanna be right
    Am                            Em      F                              
I'm callin' on you 'cause I can't do it myself
   Am                           Em           F
To me you're like a brother, so be my mother lover

     G
They blessed us both with the gift of life
    Am                                 Em            F
She brought you in this world so Im'ma sex her right
            Am                          Em        F
This is the second best idea that we've ever had
    Am                      Em           F
The choice can be no other, be my mother lover
Am
Happy Mother's Day

Mother Lover

&quot;I'm on a Boat&quot; is a single from The Lonely Island's debut album Incredibad, and was also featured as a Saturday Night Live Digital Short. The song features R&amp;B singer T-Pain. The song, produced by Wyshmaster, is a parody of many rap video cliches. The music video reached number one on YouTube in February 2009 and was number one on the U.S. iTunes music video chart. The Lonely Island has also performed the song live on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon with The Roots filling in for T-Pain.  

4th single from The Lonely Island's Second album &quot;Turtleneck &amp; Chain&quot;

Verse 1:
           B
I'm going back to the time when we owned this town
      E
Down Powder Mill Lane, in the battlegrounds
C#m        B                   G#m  B     F#
We were friends and lovers and clueless clowns


Verse 2:
                      B       
I didn't know I'd be finding out now I was torn from you
         E
When we thought about things we were gonna do
C#m      B                    G#m B  F# 
We were wide eyed dreamers and wiser too


Chorus:
               E              B 
Go down to the rides on East Parade,
        G#m                   F#
by the lights of the Palace Arcade
                    E                     G#m   F#   
Watch night coming down on the Sovereign Light Café


Verse 3:
                          B
I'm begging you for some sign, but you've still got nothing to say
        E
Don't turn your back on me, don't walk away
C#m     B                   G#m  B   F#
I'm a better man now than I was that day


Chorus:
                      E              B 
Let's go down to the rides on East Parade,
        G#m                   F#
by the lights of the Palace Arcade
                    E                     G#m   F#   
Watch night coming down on the Sovereign Light Café

                 E               B
Go down to the bandstand on the pier
           G#m                    F#
Watch the drunks and the lovers appear
                      E                     G#m   F#     
Take time, just the stars at the Sovereign Light Café


Bridge:
   E        B           F#
I wheel my bike off the train,
        F#
Up the North Trade Road,
 E        B             F# 
Look for you on Marley Lane
                          G#m
In every building, every streetlight
                   E               F#  G#m  B  F#
Oh why did we ever go so far from home?


Verse 4:
                        B
You keep on leaving me mile long traces of who you are
         E
You can get a big house and a faster car
C#m      B                    G#m   B  F#
You can run away boy, but you won't go far


Chorus:
                      E              B
Let's go down to the rides on East Parade,
        G#m                   F#
by the lights of the Palace Arcade
                    E                     G#m   F#   
Watch night coming down on the Sovereign Light Café

                    E                B
Stroll down to the bandstand on the pier
           G#m                    F#
Watch the drunks and the lovers appear
                     E                      G#m   F#
Take time, just the stars at the Sovereign Light Café 

      E            B    G#m
La la la la la la la la Yeah, 
     F#                      E       B   F#
I'm going where the people know my name


Outro:
E B G#m F#
E B G#m F# B

Sovereign Light Cafe

strumming pattern
D-DUD-D

F,G,C,Em7

mmmmm mmmm mmmm 

F                    G
Work, work, work, work, work, work. He said me haffi
C                   Em7
Work, work, work, work, work, work! He see me do mi
F                     G
Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt! So me put in
C                   Em7
Work, work, work, work, work, work. When you ah guh
F                        G
Learn, learn, learn, learn, learn Meh nuh cyar if him
C                   Em7
Hurt, hurt, hurt, hurt, hurting


[Verse 1: Rihanna]

F              G
Dry! ...Me a desert
C                 Em7
Nuh time to have ya lerkin'
F                        G
Him ago act like him nuh like it
C                           Em7
You know I dealt with you the nicest
F                        G
Nuh body touch me in the righteous
C                     Em7
Nuh botha, text me in a crisis 
           F                    G
I believed all of your dreams, adoration
            C                    Em7
You took my heart and my keys and my patience
            F                        G
You took my heart on my sleeve for decoration
                C                          Em7
You mistaken my love I brought for you for foundation
           F             G
All that I wanted from you was to give me
C            Em7
Something that I never had
F                   G
Something that you've never seen
C                     Em7
Something that you've never been!
F     G
Mmmmm!
      C                          
But I wake up and act like nothing's wrong
D
Just get ready fi...


[Hook: Rihanna]
F                    G
Work, work, work, work, work, work. He said me haffi
C                   Em7
Work, work, work, work, work, work! He see me do mi
F                     G
Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt! So me put in
C                   Em7
Work, work, work, work, work, work. When you ah guh
F                        G
Learn, learn, learn, learn, learn Meh nuh cyar if him
C                   Em7
Hurt, hurt, hurt, hurt, hurting
F             G
Ner ner ner ner ner ner!
               C           Em7
When you a guh ner ner ner ner ner ner!
                  F                 G
Before the tables turn turn turn turn turn turn!
C             Em7
Beg you something please


[Verse 2: Rihanna]

F            G
Baby don't you leave
               C                 Em7
Do''t leave me stuck here in the streets, 
   F                  G
uh huh If I get another chance to
       C                Em7
I will never, no never neglect you
      F                         G
I mean who am I to hold your past against you?
       C                    Em7
I just hope that it gets to you
  F           G
I hope that you see this through
  C                      Em7
I hope that you see this true
F          G
What can I say?
       C          
Please recognize I'm tryin', baby!!!
 Em7
I have to


[Hook: Rihanna]

F                    G
Work, work, work, work, work, work. He said me haffi
C                   Em7
Work, work, work, work, work, work! He see me do mi
F                     G
Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt! So me put in
C                   Em7
Work, work, work, work, work, work. When you ah guh
F                        G
Learn, learn, learn, learn, learn Meh nuh cyar if him
C                   Em7
Hurt, hurt, hurt, hurt, hurting


[Verse 3: Drake]

N.C.
Yeah, okay
F        G        C                   Em7
You need to get done, done, done, done at work, come over
F               G
We just need to slow the motion
C                   Em7
Don't give that away to no one
F            G
Long distance, I need you
C                          Em7
When I see potential I just gotta see it through
F                        G
If you had a twin, I would still choose you
C                           Em7
I don't wanna rush into it, if it's too soon
      F      G               C              
But I know you need to get done, done, done, done
   Em7
If you come over
F            G
Sorry if I'm way less friendly
C                    Em7
I got n____s tryna end me,
F G           C                 Em7
oh,     I spilled all my emotions tonight, I'm sorry
F               G
Rollin', rollin', rollin', rollin', rollin'
C                                Em7
How many more shots until you're rollin'?
F              G
We just need a face to face
C                    Em7            F
You could pick the time and the place
               G
You spent some time away
C                Em7
Now you need to forward and give me all the...


[Hook: Rihanna]

F                    G
Work, work, work, work, work, work. He said me haffi
C                   Em7
Work, work, work, work, work, work! He see me do mi
F                     G
Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt! So me put in
C                   Em7
Work, work, work, work, work, work. When you ah guh
F                        G
Learn, learn, learn, learn, learn Meh nuh cyar if him
C                   Em7
Hurt, hurt, hurt, hurt, hurting

mmm mmm mmm..


[Outro: Rihanna]

work work work work work work

F G C D
F G C D

Work

Intro: C D C D (x2)


C D
Si es que no puedes hablar
C D
no te atrevas a volver
C D
si te quieres ocultar
C D
tal vez te podria ver
Em D C G C
y el amor que no sabe a quien y que
G C
hablará si tu verdad
Em F
te abrazara otra vez

Em C
Habla si puedes
G C
grita que sientes
Em C
dime a quien quieres
G C
y te hace feliz

C D


C D
Si no puedes escuchar
C D
aunque insistas hablaré
C D
si lo quieres mírame
C D
y tus ojos hablaran tal vez
Em D C G C
sentiras el amor e iras tras el
G C
hablaras si tu verdad
Em F
te abrazará otra vez

Em C
Habla si puedes
G C
grita que sientes
Em C
dime a quien quieres
G D
y te hace feliz
Em C
habla si puedes
G C
grita si temes
Em C
dime a quien quieres
G D
y te hace feliz


Em G C G
.(CUERDAS)... abrazaméeeeeeeee..
C Em F
quiero despertarme y entender

Em C
habla si puedes
G C
grita si temes
Em C
dime a quien quieres
G D
y que haces aquì
Em C
habla si puedes
G C
grita que sientes
Em C
dime a quien quieres
G C
y te hace feliz
G C
y te hace feliz

C D
(fin)

Habla si puedes

LA RE
Jo et duré a casa si fa mal temps
MI FA#m
Jo t’empararé si un cas tens por
SIm MI
Jo te cuidaré si estàs malalta
RE LA
De tot cor, de tot cor
RE REm LA
De tot cor

MI RE DO#m-SIm-LA

FA#m DO#m
Estic a punt d’anar-me’n
RE LA RE
Mes abans de partir et diré
REm LA
Que et duc dins es pensament

FA#m DO#m
No deix de recordar-te
RE LA RE
I alen els teus alens tot calents
REm SIm MI
De lluny i de prop me tens


Jo et duré...

FA#m DO#m
I a dalt de s’escenari
RE LA RE
Quan estic concentrat cantant
REm MI
Jo sempre te tenc present

FA#m DO#m
Perquè m’ets necessari
RE LA
Com s’aire que respir
RE REm SIm MI
Necessit estar amb tu en tot moment


Jo et duré... ( bis )

De tot cor

(Chorus)
G
You xxxx X xxx'x smile xxxx xxx
Em
X can't xxxxx xxxxxxx xxx
Am7
I xxx'x xxxxx xxx X xxx'x sing
D7
I'm xxxxxxx xx xxxx xx xx xxxxxxxx
(1st Verse)
G
You xxx X xxxx xxx xxxx xxx'xx sad
Em
X feel xxxx xxxx xxx'xx glad
Am7
If xxx xxxx xxxx xxxx X'x xxxxx through
D7                              G Em G Em
X just xxx'x xxxxx without xxx
(2nd verse)
G
You xxxx along xxxx xxxx x song
Em
Xxx brightened xx xxx
Am7
Whod've xxxxxxxx xxxx xxx xxxx xxxx xx x dream
                  D7
Xxx xx xxx xxxxx light xxxxx xxxx
(Chorus)
         G 
Xxx now xxx xxx X xxx'x smile xxxx xxx
Em
X can't xxxxx xxxxxxx xxx
Am7
I xxx'x xxxxx xxx X xxx'x sing
D7                          Eb
I'm xxxxxxx xx xxxx xx xx anything
(3rd Verse)
Ab
You xxx X xxxx xxx xxxx xxx'xx sad
   Fm
X feel xxxx xxxx xxx'xx glad
Bbm
If xxx xxxx xxxx xxxx X'x xxxxx through
Ebm
X just xxx'x xxxxx
Ebm                                 Ab               C#
Now xxxx xxxxxx xxx happiness xxxxx so xxxx xxxx xx find
C#m                                         Eb     E
Well, X'x xxxxxxx xx xxxx xxxxxxx xxxx xxxx behind me
A
And xxx xxx X xxx'x smile xxxxxxx xxx
F#m
X can't xxxxx xxxxxxx xxx
Bm
X xxx'x laugh xxx X xxx'x sing
E
X'x finding xx xxxx xx xx xxxxxxxx
Bb
You xxx X xxxx xxxx xxxx xxx'xx glad
Gm
X feel xxx xxxx xxx'xx sad
Cm
If xxx xxxx knew xxxx X'x xxxxx through
F
X just xxx'x smile xxxxxxx xxx

Can't Smile Without You

Intro: Em  A  Em  A

       Em               A                Em                   
 A
Verse: Be on my side or be on your side, there is no reason for you to hide,
       Em                 A
       Its so hard for me stayin' here all alone, when you could be takin'
       A                Em                                             A
       Me for a ride... She could drag me, over the rainbow, send me away


        G     D         A    G  D          A
Chorus:  Down by the ri-ver,  I shot my ba-by

 Em        A
 Ooh, Ooh, shot her dead


Verse 2:You take my hand I'll take your hand, together we may get away,

        This must madness is too much sorrow, its impossible to make it

        today... She could drag me, over the rainbow, send me away


(Chorus)

(Verse 1)

Down By The River

Intro: D-A-Bm-Em-A  x4

         D                 A                          
I'll confess tonight your all thats on my mind
        Bm            A                   D
I know these roof top nights could last forever.
              A                            Bm
we watched the seasons change, we saw the distance pull us away,
           A
from all we shared together.

D                       A
Right now is all we have you better make this count
Bm                       A
these are the moments i wish i could forget you.

D                            A                                          Bm
I think back to the nights I looked into your bright green eyes and you said,
    Em    A
lets run away.
D                             A                             Bm
its 9am the sun wont rise for 3 more hours pacific time you said
    Em    A
lets run away.

play intro  x2

D                    A
I picked apart every word that you said
  Bm                              A
I dissected each sentence but kept coming up empty
D                         A
the way you are leaves me counting the days
        Bm                            A
till the next time this distance will be a memory


D                        A        
Right now is all we have you better make this count
Bm                     D
these are the moments i wish i could forget you.


D                            A                                          Bm
I think back to the nights I looked into your bright green eyes and you said,
     Em   A
lets run away.
D                            A                              Bm
its 9am the sun wont rise for 3 more hours pacific time you said
     Em   A
lets run away.

D-A-Bm-A

where have you been


                                                                        Bm
I think back to the nights I looked into your bright green eyes and you said,
     Em   A
lets run away.
D                            A                                          Bm
I think back to the nights I looked into your bright green eyes and you said,
     Em   A
lets run away.
D                            A                              Bm
its 9am the sun wont rise for 3 more hours pacific time you said
     Em   A
lets run away


American Dream 

G Bm Em A
Well everybody's lookin' for something they can't find,
Walking straight ahead blind-folded production line,
Only taking time for one type of shoe-shine.
Don't look left/right now you got a street fine.
Everybody lookin' for just a little more.
Working late-nights trying to fight off the day glow.
Waiting for the come-around but it is a no show.
Driving in the fast lane lookin' for the slow-mo...

C D A
Oh whats in store I don't know anymore.
Oh what's inside 'cos I can't hide from it no more.
Oh what you see well it's not me anymore.
Oh I don't know well I don't know man anymore because 

G Bm Em A
I tell you once I tell you twice, gonna be a long time
But you don't take no one's advice, gonna be a long time you,
Where were you, you weren't listenin', gonna be a long time
Gonna be a long time.

G Bm Em A
So now you're face down, face lookin like a frying pan.
Hitting up the clubs trying to feel like a real man.
Beating your chest just like you're King Kong but you're just a gui-tar no-string no-song.
Feeling free like ya don't even know it, man you're towing the line hoping you just don't blow it.
Man ya stuck in the mainframe trying to win the big game so much potential it even makes it more of a shame, shame, shame...
Here we go again, same old shit just another name.
Looking at the destiny there in your palm,
But now you got your strings but you got no song.
So sing, sing, sing - shake it like a chicken wing.
It's not what you get it's about what you bring-bring-bring.
So bring it, bring it to the table, not because you have to 'cos you're willing and you're able!

C D A
Oh what's in store I don't know anymore.
Oh what's inside 'cos I can't hide from it no more.
Oh what you see well it's not me anymore.
Oh I don't know, I don't know anymore because 

G Bm Em A
I tell you once I tell you twice, gonna be a long time.
But you don't take no one's advice, gonna be a long time.
You, where were you, you weren't listening, gonna be a long time.
Gonna be a long time.

Gonna Be A Long Time

[intro x2]
A  E  D A

A                                        E
when there's no place you feel at home
              D                               A
and you think you'd be better off alone
A                                          E
when you think there's no reason to try
               D                           A
and you hate yourself and wanna die

A                                      E
when you're filled with anxiety
             D                   A
and everyone's your enemy
A                                        E
when you wish you were someone else
                 D                        A
and you wanna go out and kill yourself

[chorus]

E D                 A
ooh you're overreacting

(you can change your mind)
E D                A
ooh you're overreacting

(take your time)


A                       E
when you get yourself depressed
                      D                   A
because you think you can't do your best
A                                         E
when you write yourself a stupid song
           D                        A
to remind yourself that you forgot

[chorus]

E D                 A
ooh you're overreacting

(you can change your mind)
E D                A
ooh you're overreacting

(take your time)


[BRIDGE]
# chords x2:
A  E  D  A

A|------------------------------------------------------|
E|-0-2--------------------------------------------------|
C|------------------------------------------------------|
G|-----2-4-2---2-4-2-1---1-1-2-2-1-2-4-2-1-22-----------|     x2



[chorus]

E D                 A
ooh you're overreacting

(you can change your mind)
E D                A
ooh you're overreacting

Overreacting

It takes a while to get used to the rhythm. In the verse the
time signature goes 3/4 for 2 bars then 2/4 for 1 bar and then
repeats.


Intro and Verses:

A|-2---3---2-|-5-------5-|------|-10------10|-9-------9-|------
E|-----------|-----------|------|-----------|-----------|----3-
C|-0---------|-2---2-----|------|-----7-----|-----------|-2----
G|-0---------|-0---------|-0----|-9---------|-7---------|------
   |   |   |   |   |   |   |  |   |   |   |   |   |   |   |  |

Intro Riff:

A|-10--12--10-|-9---10---9-|-2---3---2-|-5-------5-|-------|
E|------------|------------|-----------|-----------|-------|
C|------------|------------|-0---------|-2---2-----|-------|
G|-9----------|-7----------|-0---------|-0---------|-0-----|



Chorus:

                   C
I...              driving...
     G  
The speed...            

Em
      City...

        D
And...  arm...
    
    C  Em        D
And I      had a feeling...

    C  Em        D
And I      had a feeling...

C           D
be...       be... 

Suggestion: during the verses, it can sound pretty cool if you
get a friend to strum the chords: C, G, Em, D in the background
:)

3-way ( It's Not Gay )	No rating	intermediate	Chords	Full
Finest Girl Bin Laden Song intro	No rating	beginner	Tab	-
I Just Had Sex	No rating	intermediate	Chords	Riff
I Just Had Sex	No rating	intermediate	Chords	Full
I Just Had Sex (feat. Akon)	No rating	intermediate	Chords	Full
I'm On A Boat	No rating	beginner	Chords	Full	Other versions
Im On A Boat	No rating	beginner	Chords	Full
Jack Sparrow	No rating	beginner	Chords	Full
Ji$@ In My Pants	No rating	beginner	Chords	Full
Mother Lover	No rating	beginner	Chords	Full
The Creep	No rating	beginner	Chords	Full

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